And what of Dmitri Shostakovich's absurdist satire "The Nose" (1930), after Nikolai Gogol's short story, sniffing its way through its Metropolitan Opera premiere performances this month, guided with spirit and with care by conductor Valery Gergiev and director William Kentridge (debut)? "The Nose" opened at the Met on March 5 and the March 11 hearing, the second of six, is discussed here.

If you're a low-level bureaucrat in St. Petersburg, like Collegiate Assessor Kovalyov-baritone Paulo Szot, of "South Pacific" Tony Award-winning fame, new to the company, but handily commanding the Met stage-and suddenly your nose-tenor Gordon Gietz, in his Met debut role, on the high Cs-declares its independence and, taking on human form, a higher rank, State Councilor, than your own, expect precious little assistance from the maniacs around you: the self-important Police Inspector-tenor Andrei Popov, Met debutant, on the high E-flats-looking for a handout for returning the nose; the newspaper clerk-veteran bass-baritone James Courtney-reluctant to accept your classified ad, but offering a pinch of snuff, which you can't sniff; the weird doctor-bass Gennady Bezzubenkov-putting you through a humiliating and useless examination and recommending adjusting to living without a nose, instead of reattaching it, as you requested; or even your faithful balalaika-strumming servant, Ivan-Sergei Skorokhodov, another striking tenor newcomer.

However did Szot's Kovalyov wind up in this sorry predicament? Did the barber, Ivan Yakovlevich-bass Vladimir Ognovenko-give too close a shave, as his wife, Praskovya Osipovna-Claudia Waite, of the strong arms and strong soprano, doubling as a street vendor, selling bagels? pretzels? herself?-suggests? Did prospective mother-in-law Mme Podtochina, the Staff Officer's wife-mezzo-soprano Barbara Dever-who wants Kovalyov to wed her lovely daughter-soprano Erin Morley-put a spell on him? Or does the blame fall on the vodka, on hand as an aftershave?

Listen for the Tchaikovsky-style Romantic opera quartet-Morley, Dever, Szot and Adam Klein-about the possible spell and unlikely match; the quotation from music that introduces Catherine the Great at the end of Act Two, Scene One of Tchaikovsky's "Queen of Spades;" the all-percussion interlude; and the musical saw. Watch the antic police molest the bagel/pretzel seller, and galvanize into a lynch mob to beat the nose.

Come to one of the four performances of "The Nose" that remain, at this writing, on March 13 at 1 p.m., or 18, 23 or 25 at 8 p.m., the last conducted by Pavel Smelkov, and see the wild-and-woolly trappings by debuting team Kentridge and Sabine Theunissen (sets), Greta Goiris (costumes), Catherine Meyburgh (video composition and editing), and Urs Schönebaum (lighting), and hear, beside the aforementioned singers, Grigory Soloviov, Tony Stevenson, Brian Kontes, Ricardo Lugo, Kevin Burdette, Philip Horst, David Crawford, Philip Cokorinos, Christopher Schaldenbrand, Jeremy Galyon, Michael Myers, Brian Frutiger, Jeffrey Behrens, soprano Maria Gavrilova making her presence felt as a mother, Dennis Petersen, Vassily Gorshkov, LeRoy Lehr, mezzo-soprano Theodora Hanslowe in a moving scene as a dying matron, and Kathryn Day.

For tickets, priced from $15 to 375, telephone 212/362-6000, visit www.metopera.org, or go the Met box office at Lincoln Center. Rush tickets, for $20, are available at the box office on the day of performance, from Monday through Thursday.